A lot of thinking.

Well I have been doing a lot of thinking the past few days. Last night at Overflow really helped me make some decisions. I never thought that going to one would help me decide on what I should do. One thing that really stuck out to me was pray when you lust. I feel like I have been doing a lot of lusting lately and losing focus of what I should really be concentrating on. I should really be concentrating on the person I really like. It doesnt matter that they have left to go far away for 2 months. I am strong enough to wait and be patient. I going to keep telling myself that. I really want to make this work and hope I dont go crazy. If it doesnt work because they decide that they don't like me anymore or moved on or whatever the reason, well at least I want to say I got something out of it. Patience. Also the fact that I have proved to myself that I can do it. I can wait. I know in the end if that happens, I will probably feel stupid for not doing anything over the summer but oh well. I have the rest of my life to find out everything. Its not a good thing to know everything right now anyhow. It takes away the fun of life and the mystery. I need to just be happy right now and resist temptations and lust.

Ill blog more later. My hand is hurting.

Lets say the last post before this just doesnt exist anymore...Im going to stick with what I told myself I would from now on...